Fun With Frequently Asked Questions

I live here, why would I want to take the tours?

Because you probably care more about the City than folks from out of town. And, we bet you don’t know as much as you think. We bet you think Coit Tower is designed as a fire nozzle to honor firemen. We bet you think there were tunnels under Chinatown. Heck, we even bet you think Mark Twain said something about the weather here. Sheesh, do you have a lot to learn!!!
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I don’t live here, why would I want to take the tours?

Because the history of San Francisco is fascinating, funny, exciting, dramatic, and had a profound effect on U.S. history. Wouldn’t it be nice to know just how sinful and decadent was the Barbary Coast? Or see the place where just a few words set off the greatest peacetime, mass migration in the history of the world? Or how San Francisco played an important role in winning the Civil War? Now, that’s what we call enriching your visit! Or, how about going places where tour buses are prohibited – like the back alleys of Chinatown.

We bet that you have a connection to San Francisco in some way – you might have had a great grandfather who came to get rich in the gold rush; an uncle that went to war in the Pacific from here and met his first love at the Top of the Mark, a sister who found Valencia Street to be a perfect neighborhood, maybe you came here in 1967 for the Summer of Love but you forgot!  (If you remember the 60s, you weren’t there – Robin Williams.)
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Why does it take two tours to get the full history of San Francisco?

We figure this is a good way to get you to pay twice!  Nah. Seriously, there simply isn’t enough time in a two hour tour to tell you the story, without making it just a list of facts – boring. That’s what high school history classes do.  And more than two hours is too long for most people. The only way to get you the full story it is to have two tours of no more than two hours each. Even one of our tours is worth taking by itself, but to make it easier, once you take one tour, the second tour is 50% off. And, you don’t have to pay in advance to get the discount. You can take both tours in the same day, or come back another time. The fact that we can tell the whole story in two tours is nothing short of amazing!!!
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What should I have with me when I take the tour?

  • Good walking shoes (really, some people don’t think about this)
  • A sweater/sweatshirt and a jacket/windbreaker
  • An empty bladder (there aren’t a lot of public restrooms on the tours)
  • A camera (you’ll want a picture of us, at least).
  • From November to April, an umbrella – just in case
  • Something to drink (If it’s in a flask, you have to share with us)

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Is this a good way to dump off my relatives, in-laws and out of town guests for a few hours?

Absolutely. They really want to see San Francisco, and frankly, we can do a better job showing them than you can. Just think, if they take both tours, you’ll have a four hour break from them! Enjoy!
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Is the tour suitable for children?

The tours do include stories about the Barbary Coast, one of the most decadent, crime-ridden places on the face of the earth. So there are stories about prostitution, drugs and bizarre behavior. We find that most children today are fully aware of these topics. (They probably know more about this stuff than we adults do!) But we’ll be happy to adjust our stories accordingly if parents are concerned.
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Are children welcome on the tour?

Absolutely! In fact, all children 17 and younger are welcome at no cost, gratis, free as long they are old enough to handle the tours, without getting tired, bored and/or cranky! I’ve had a few children over the years who have asked the smartest questions, and showed great interest – and they are a joy to have on the tour. (For the enjoyment of everyone on the tour, we will ask guests with disruptive children to come back another time).
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Do the tours end where they begin, and why the heck not?

No they don’t. Many tours do end where they start for the convenience of their guests. However, we did not want to sacrifice any of the great sites and stories of our tours for convenience. But not to worry. We will be sure that you can find your way anywhere in the City from the end of the tours.  Besides, you probably won’t want to leave the area anytime soon.
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I’m going to take your tours sometime between April and August. Will I be comfortable in my Hawaiian shirt, Bermuda shorts and flip flops?

NO! NO! NO! God No! Haven’t you heard about San Francisco’s FOG. Where are you from, Greenland? San Francisco is so unique, we even have our own climate. Even though we’re in California, these are the coldest months of the year in San Francisco!  You see, the cold winds that accompany the icy currents of the Pacific from the Bering Strait sweep through the Golden Gate …. oh, never mind why.  In San Francisco, you can be broiling in the sun, and freezing in the shade.  At the same time.

Day or night, always dress in layers – shirt, plus sweater/sweatshirt, plus coat/jacket/windbreaker. You will be putting on and taking off depending on where you are in the City (a little known fact – it’s often much warmer to be outside at midnight, when the wind dies down, than at any time during the day). Always wear comfortable walking shoes. Formal wear is not required (but if you did show up in a tux, that would be way cool.)
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Do you need snow shoes and mucklucks during the winter months?

No. San Francisco has banned snow. From November to April is our rainy season, so you might want to bring an umbrella – although generally, if it’s sunny in the morning, it’ll probably be sunny all day. It never gets too cold to be outdoors in San Francisco, except in July. In fact, you’ll probably be just fine with the same combination of layers in January as you are in July. (BTW, what the heck is a muckluck?)
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Are reservations required, and why?

Yes, for several reasons.  Look, who is fooling who here?  This is a one person operation (see About Us).  That person, being me, would love to be able to do the tours 7/365.  But that’s not going to happen.  So, if you make a reservation, unless something unforeseen happens, there will be a tour that day.  If you just walk up to the starting point, I might not be there, and that will be devastating, I know.   We also cancel if no one reserves a tour.  On the flip side, we want to limit the number of guests on a tour to approximately 15.  It’s difficult for everyone to hear and to move around the life on the streets if there are too many people on a tour. We want to be sure that you don’t come to the starting point and for some reason, we’re not there.
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Why must we pay for this when there are free tours available?

If you’ve been in San Francisco for more than five minutes, you know how expensive it is here. This is our livelihood and we’re professional about it. There are a number of San Francisco walking tours that are free that I highly recommend, given by San Francisco City Guides, The San Francisco Museum and Historical Society and the California Historical Society. They are all given by volunteers, so quality can vary from tour to tour. They focus on specific topics or small geographical areas.  Some tours are scheduled on a weekly basis, but some may be a couple of months apart.  No free tour is available on a daily basis.  None offer you the comprehensive tour from the San Francisco’s origins to the City of today that we do. You would have to take many tours over several days or weeks in order to equal what we give in just two tours on one day.
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How do we pay for the tours?

We collect at the start of each tour. We accept cash or travelers checks.  Or we could work a deal – you clean my apartment, I’ll give you two free tours!
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What if it rains the day of the tour?

We like to stay dry and cozy on really wet and wintry days. In all probability, steady rain will mean cancellation of the tour that day.  However, if the rain is a drizzle, and/or the weather forecast calls for clearing, the tour will go on. Call us at 415-317-TOUR (8687) the morning of your tour for updated information.  If you have already paid for a tour, and we cancel, we’ll refund your money, even if we cancel during a tour.
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Can I schedule a tour by phone instead of on the web at SFWalksandTalks.com?

Afraid we’re going to sell your email information to some marketing firm? We won’t do that. Feel free to call 415-317-TOUR (8687) anytime between the hours of 7:30 a.m. and 8 p.m. (Pacific Time) and we will sell your phone number to tele-marketers in Bangladesh.  (Just kidding)
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Can I get you to speak to my group about San Francisco?

I thought you’d never ask. I love to talk, especially about San Francisco. And, I’ll bring great photos of historic San Francisco to show your group while I tell you the history of the City. Please see the our Live Documentaries for a description of our programs on Emperor Norton and the Golden Gate Bridge.  We can customize a program for you as well.  Just call us at 415-317-TOUR (8687).
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Can I ask a question related to San Francisco that’s not about your tours?

Sure – just click on Contact Us and we’ll be happy to answer any question you may have, as long as we can do it quickly and without a lot of research, cause I’m lazy. Hey, that’s why they invented librarians.
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